Category Archives: Parenting

The ONE thing I dread as a parent

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We all have that one thing we DREAD about raising kids. Or at least I think we do? Help me out here people. Surely there is SOMETHING that you absolutely dread about parenting, whether it be current or in the future. Mine? Dealing with mean kids and bullying. Finding the right balance between Defending Yourself and Killing People With Kindness is a fine line and to every person means something different.

We were having lunch with Paulina and Emma at a fast food chain that had an indoor play area. They had adequate seating inside the room where the play area was, so we were sitting at a bench, eating our lunch while the girls played. There was only two other adults in there and two little girls.

I was periodically walking over to check on Zoey and she was just having fun being a silly 2 year old. I heard the older girls getting acquainted, asking each other their ages and whatnot. I heard that one is 7 and one is almost 6. They began playing together, though the 7 year old was McBossyPants. I went back to sit down and finish eating and I hear one of the older girls, REALLY meanly yelling “GO AWAY! STOP FOLLOWING US! YOU’RE SO ANNOYING!” and I’m thinking, surely they aren’t talking to my TODDLER?

I went to check on them and sure enough they were yelling at her, over and over again in a REALLY mean way. Zoey was giggling because she thought it was a game. I told the girls that she was only 2 years old and she doesn’t know any better. I tried to deter Zoey from playing with them but she REALLY wanted to play with the big kids and was having so much fun. Oh to be naive again!

I stood there for a while, watching them play because I just didn’t trust those girls. Any kid that is going to be deliberately and downright MEAN to a toddler is obviously not to be trusted! They crawled up the platform steps and Zoey got up 2 steps behind them and I see the girl lean forward and yell “GO AWAY! STOP FOLLOWING US!” and kick Zoey in the head. Zoey said OW! really loudly and rubbed her head, but wanted to keep playing. THAT is when I drew the line and I told the girls not to touch her again and if she did I would go get her Mother. She got scared and apologized.

Ok here is the thing.. I WANTED so badly to kick that girl in the head, too. But I didn’t. You know why? Because a woman in her 20s kicking a 7 year old girl in the head would not go over well with, well, ANYONE. Just like a SEVEN YEAR OLD kicking a TWO YEAR OLD in the head doesn’t. If this were another 2 or 3 year old hitting my kid, I would not have been near as livid as I was. This wasn’t even a sibling fight either, which is a little more understandable too. This is a REALLY MEAN 7 year old little girl just being a total brat and sadly I am sure it is directly related to how she has been raised this far. Her Mother was sitting there playing games on her cell phone the entire time this was happening, not paying ANY attention. The other little girl was there with her Grandfather and he was reading a book.

If my kids EVER do something like this, regardless of the other kids age, EVER, they will be in some serious trouble. Teaching acceptance and tolerance is my number one goal with my children. It broke my heart that some little girl was just being down right mean for no reason at all. Zoey couldn’t even keep up with them because they were so fast, so she wasn’t bothering them physically or anything. I seriously had tears in my eyes because it upset me so much. I am home with my children all the time and they do not get socialization at day care so I was really excited to see Zoey wanting to be social with strangers. It was just a shame that it had to end up being a bratty girl. Thankfully Zoey thinks she just had a great old time and hopefully she didn’t take anything from the whole Kicking People In The Head.

I know she is going to have to learn about mean people and how to handle those situations but 2 years old seems so young to already be learning about it. Give her another year or two or FIFTEEN, PLEASE.

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we’re in trouble this time

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This baby is a mover and a shaker! I think I felt one “big” kick from Zoey when she was in utero. A few little flutters here and there, but that is it. She was lying transverse through my entire pregnancy and I think she was just a mostly chilled out baby. This one, however, is complete opposite. Not only am I feeling some major kicks and punches on a daily basis, I am also able to feel and see the movements externally. Which hello, is TOTALLY EXCITING. I kind of admitted defeat when I was pregnant with Zoey and just chalked up the lack of movement to the fact that I was a plus sized gal. Now I’m realizing that it wasn’t necessarily the case and that we just had a really laid back little girl in there.

When we were on vacation, I was laying on my side in bed with my hand on my stomach and I felt the kick from the outside and I wanted to jump out of the bed with excitement! I grabbed Gene’s hand and put it on my tummy and the baby ceased to move. Of course! Either way, I’ll never forget where I was or when it happened because it was such an amazing experience.

When we got home from vacation I had my iPhone sitting on my stomach and I was typing on the laptop when I saw my phone moving. I looked down and we both watched my phone twitch here and there. Silly girl (?) is an active one! On a daily basis I have to make sure to keep my bladder empty because there have been several occasions where I am seriously concerned that I am going to pee my pants from all of the punches and kicks to the bladder.

Last but not least, in utero hiccups? I thought that was a total lie when I was pregnant with Zoey. Never ONCE felt any rhythmic movement that could be considered hiccups. This time? I feel them every single day, usually in the early afternoon! I can tell they are hiccups because they’re the exact same movements, they’ve got a certain rhythm about them and they are usually pretty short lived.

I know this has all been said before. I know this is all mundane stuff to experienced Mama’s. But this is a HUGE deal for me because like I said, I never experienced any of this with my pregnancy with Zoey and I really felt like I was getting the short end of the stick when it came to my pregnancy with her.

So yay for new experiences and double yay for an impending baby (or doom, you choose)! :-) I am nervous as all get out about having a 21 month old and a newborn and I know it is going to be challenging.

Last night while we were in bed, I looked at Gene and said “We need to make a pact for when this baby is born. That we wont go insane. That we’ll remind each other to stay sane, through the insanity.” and we high-fived. It was a high-five fail, so we re-did our high five to make it perfect.

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Just let her do it!

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The thought of my daughter learning to spoon feed herself gives me small coronaries. The more I think about it, the more I get until I am in a full blown heart attack. The mess that goes along with learning to spoon feed yourself is a given and I know you know exactly what I am talking about. But, if there is one thing I am learning as a parent, it is that sometimes you just have to live in the moment and let them get messy. Sometimes you have to ignore the pretty white shirt that just got splattered with spaghetti sauce or the adorable pants that just became victim of a blow out.

So when I made spaghetti last night I decided that I would strip Zoey down and let her have at it. I mean, what is more fun that making a mess and eating spaghetti?

Yummmm

She loved it! As soon as I put the tray down with the cut up spaghetti noodles and sauce on it, she started hitting the tray like a wild maniac. Noodles were flying everywhere. She would pick noodles up by the handful and throw them or drop them on the floor. And…

Her permanent spot in the house now

That was the happiest dog in the universe last night. She sat there, patiently attentive. Waiting. Yearning. Begging. PLEASE DROP MORE!

Yum Noodles!

I had to spoon a few noodles into her mouth so she would realize that this is stuff that you can not only play with but also EAT! And YUM! It is delicious! Once she had a bite, she realized what it was and started eating them. It took some serious concentration and a level of hand eye coordination that she didn’t even know she was capable of but she would eventually get a noodle into her mouth. I even witnessed her splurping a few noodles up.. I had no idea she knew how to slurp a noodle! And by the way, slurping noodles is annoying and I hate when I hear people do it.. but when my sweet peanut is doing it, it is the cutest thing ever :)

You know, it is a little more challenging these days to feed her. We don’t give her baby puree very often anymore and I try to give her whatever we are having for dinner. Making sure she is getting a healthy, well balanced diet is not an easy task. I’m sure it would be easier if I was making sure my husband and I were always getting a well balanced diet but sometimes it is hard to remember to take care of yourself when you are so busy taking care of someone else.

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So THIS is what being a parent is all about

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It’s 3 AM. I wish I could say that I was drunk-writing a blog entry after being out on a wild night on the town or a great party but sadly, that is not the case. Oh no, I am writing this because a certain little peanut woke up crying at 2 AM. Hubby rocked her while I dosed up some infant’s tylenol, teething tablets and a bottle. It worked but hubby was concerned about her breathing while she was asleep so we ended up waking her up while trying to administer saline drops, suction her nose and give her a sauna-esque experience in the bathroom.

Suffice it to say, I think Z and I may be going to our respective doctor’s on Monday. I am still so sick and she is still pretty congested as well. I have been taking Muc*inex, Tyl*enol, Del*sym and whatever else I can find over the counter to help with this monster of a cold but it just doesn’t seem to be working. The coughing and congestion in my chest is really what is starting to get to me. The constant coughing almost always triggers an asthma attack which has caused me to take one too many puffs on the ol’ inhaler one too many times.

This is one thing I hate about being sick when it lingers.. I never really know when to just suck it up and “wait it out” or give in and go see the doctor. I absolutely hate when I go to the doctor, give them my hard earned $20 co-pay for them to tell me to go to the store and buy a $20 bottle of Muc*inex over the counter.

Right now I am sitting here in tears. Because I am just sick of my sweet little girl being congested. I’m sick of her teething and being in pain. I am sick of MYSELF being sick because I feel like I don’t have the energy to even take care of her. I just want us all to be back to our normal selves. It was much easier that way!

Sidenote: This last week has been the WEEK OF HELL! The hardest week EVER in this parenting gig, so far. I think to add to Z’s congestion and cold, she has been teething. Her bottom 2 teeth just came in a few weeks ago but her top two are now peaking through the gums. You can just barely feel them through her swollen little gummies. She has been drooling excessively, whining almost 24/7, crying a lot and waking up a LOT at night. Today was the best day she has had yet.. Not much whining or crying, she was a happy little soul and it was sooo good to see my sweet baby again that I know oh so well! We hung out with Grandma and Grandpa almost all day so maybe that is why she was in such good spirits? She really loves them!

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The First Bloody Incident (and I don’t mean that in a British way)

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Big Grin!

Thursday I was out having lunch with a good friend when Z was acting pretty tame so I decided it would be a good time to clip her nails. She had grabbed onto my neck earlier that morning and I almost shrieked when I felt her tiny little daggers sink into my neck. I got her left hand cut pretty easily and quickly. I had become pretty good at using the nail clippers on her. I only used an emery board on her nails until she was at least 12 weeks old and then I finally grew the balls to try the big girl clippers. So far it had been fairly easy and we had no real issues.

Well, Thursday was not my day. All of the Patting On The Back I did to myself was thrown out the window on this fateful Thursday. I started with her right thumb, which had a gianormous nail on it. I was sitting in the dark (not pitch black, but no lights on over head) and I remember clearly thinking, I should turn the lights on while I do this so I can actually see what I’m doing. You know, when I’m using a sharp object to CUT MY DAUGHTER’S NAILS. Can you tell where this is going? Because I’m not very good at leading up to suspenseful endings without giving the story away far in advance. Anyway, so I cut her nail and as soon as I cut it, she started crying and had this look of horror on her face. I checked and she was bleeding. A LOT.

I mean.. A LOT. We soaked a couple of tissues trying to get it to stop bleeding. We tried tiny bandaids but they just wouldn’t stay on her SUPER TINY hand. We needed Super Tiny bandaids, damnit!! Are there even such a thing as infant bandaids?? I have no idea. So she didn’t cry near as much as I expected her to. She became really fussy afterwards but I think it was a mixture of PTSD and sleepiness. I gave her some of the yummy grape flavored infant Tylenol and she went to sleep immediately. I put a tissue in her hand and she grasped it (yay for those graspy little infant hands!) and held it the whole time she was asleep. After a good hour or so it had stopped bleeding and hasn’t bled since and she has been fine.

But me?? I have beat myself up over it at least 4 times today already. When I’m holding her, I look at her thumb and want to kick myself. I know it’s a stupid mistake and I’m sure a lot of us have done it.. but I can’t help but think back and wonder why I didn’t just turn the stinkin’ light on! I shouldn’t have grown so confident in my alleged Professional Infant Nail Cutting. I guess all that matters is that Z is ok and I am ok and we are all on the road to being ok over this whole thing.

But I can’t promise that my daughter is going to have short nails any time soon. I just hope she doesn’t scratch herself anytime in the near future or I am going to be forced to do it again before I’ve fully recovered.

Astro Update: I took him to the Vet today because I found sores ALL OVER his stomach. $50 later and he has a Staph infection and is on 2 weeks of antibiotics. Poor dog. His wound on his side is healing up nicely and we’re guessing that is how he got the Staph infection. I coated that darn thing with Neosporin for a few days but I guess it just wasn’t enough. He’s still wearing his frumpy t-shirt around the house as I wait for that wound to FULLY heal.

Emma Update: Astro was locked in the bathroom last night (so he wouldn’t poo all over my carpet) and we woke up to poo on the floor in our bedroom. Which means only one thing: IT WAS EMMA. It had to be her because Astro was still in the bathroom when we got up this morning. So now I have no idea which dog has the poo problem and which doesn’t or if they both have it? It’s all a freakin’ mystery to me! So now they are both confined to each bathroom when we are out so I can figure out who is having the problem.

My Sanity Update: It’s GONE. MIA. If you see it, please send it back to me. I need it. It helps this day to day gig go much smoother.

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I’m having an asthma attack while I type this but I haven’t gone to get my inhaler because I am THAT dedicated to this blog

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The last couple of nights Z has been really hard to handle in the evenings. She cries, hasn’t been eating her last bottle of the evening and has been going to bed around 8 or 9 on what I think is an almost empty tummy and somehow, amazingly, sleeping through the night still. It sounds to me like her cries are exhausted cries but now that she is getting older, we are having a hard time decoding her cries. When she was just a few weeks old, we could tell if she was hungry, bored, gassy, over-stimulated, etc. We had them all down and when someone would say “Someone needs to feed the poor baby!” we could easily chime in and say “Nope, that is her gassy cry.. she must have some bad gas right now” and it made us feel so confident in this parenting gig.

But times have changed and we’re on to the Screaming Child With Out Of Options Parents phase. We’ve changed her diaper, we’ve tried to feed her, we’ve tried to give her a pacifier, we’ve rocked her, we’ve laid her down, we’ve burped her… NOW WHAT?! I guess sometimes you just have to comfort them and cross your fingers that the crying will subside eventually. I mean, it can’t last forever, right? RIGHT?!

So Gene put her in the co-sleeper and she eventually settled herself to sleep. And he fell asleep right next to her on the bed. I did dishes and washed bottles. Now I’m unwinding a little before I hit the sack myself. It’s not even 10 PM but I am feeling a little exhausted from the crazy evening we had. The pest guy is coming to spray the house at 8:30 AM so we are heading out for some morning shopping whenever he is done. I can’t stand to be in the house after he sprays because the smell causes my asthma to flair up. But it’s totally worth the chemical-smell because do you know how many DEAD spiders I find in our house??? A LOT. Did I mention that they are already dead when I find them?? I have to smash, maybe, ONE spider per year! I heart our pest guy!

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