The First Bloody Incident (and I don’t mean that in a British way)

Thursday I was out having lunch with a good friend when Z was acting pretty tame so I decided it would be a good time to clip her nails. She had grabbed onto my neck earlier that morning and I almost shrieked when I felt her tiny little daggers sink into my neck. I got her left hand cut pretty easily and quickly. I had become pretty good at using the nail clippers on her. I only used an emery board on her nails until she was at least 12 weeks old and then I finally grew the balls to try the big girl clippers. So far it had been fairly easy and we had no real issues.

Well, Thursday was not my day. All of the Patting On The Back I did to myself was thrown out the window on this fateful Thursday. I started with her right thumb, which had a gianormous nail on it. I was sitting in the dark (not pitch black, but no lights on over head) and I remember clearly thinking, I should turn the lights on while I do this so I can actually see what I’m doing. You know, when I’m using a sharp object to CUT MY DAUGHTER’S NAILS. Can you tell where this is going? Because I’m not very good at leading up to suspenseful endings without giving the story away far in advance. Anyway, so I cut her nail and as soon as I cut it, she started crying and had this look of horror on her face. I checked and she was bleeding. A LOT.

I mean.. A LOT. We soaked a couple of tissues trying to get it to stop bleeding. We tried tiny bandaids but they just wouldn’t stay on her SUPER TINY hand. We needed Super Tiny bandaids, damnit!! Are there even such a thing as infant bandaids?? I have no idea. So she didn’t cry near as much as I expected her to. She became really fussy afterwards but I think it was a mixture of PTSD and sleepiness. I gave her some of the yummy grape flavored infant Tylenol and she went to sleep immediately. I put a tissue in her hand and she grasped it (yay for those graspy little infant hands!) and held it the whole time she was asleep. After a good hour or so it had stopped bleeding and hasn’t bled since and she has been fine.

But me?? I have beat myself up over it at least 4 times today already. When I’m holding her, I look at her thumb and want to kick myself. I know it’s a stupid mistake and I’m sure a lot of us have done it.. but I can’t help but think back and wonder why I didn’t just turn the stinkin’ light on! I shouldn’t have grown so confident in my alleged Professional Infant Nail Cutting. I guess all that matters is that Z is ok and I am ok and we are all on the road to being ok over this whole thing.

But I can’t promise that my daughter is going to have short nails any time soon. I just hope she doesn’t scratch herself anytime in the near future or I am going to be forced to do it again before I’ve fully recovered.

Astro Update: I took him to the Vet today because I found sores ALL OVER his stomach. $50 later and he has a Staph infection and is on 2 weeks of antibiotics. Poor dog. His wound on his side is healing up nicely and we’re guessing that is how he got the Staph infection. I coated that darn thing with Neosporin for a few days but I guess it just wasn’t enough. He’s still wearing his frumpy t-shirt around the house as I wait for that wound to FULLY heal.

Emma Update: Astro was locked in the bathroom last night (so he wouldn’t poo all over my carpet) and we woke up to poo on the floor in our bedroom. Which means only one thing: IT WAS EMMA. It had to be her because Astro was still in the bathroom when we got up this morning. So now I have no idea which dog has the poo problem and which doesn’t or if they both have it? It’s all a freakin’ mystery to me! So now they are both confined to each bathroom when we are out so I can figure out who is having the problem.

My Sanity Update: It’s GONE. MIA. If you see it, please send it back to me. I need it. It helps this day to day gig go much smoother.