So last night was a little rough. Zoey has been really fussy lately and I think it’s gas related. We’ve been in the same ol’ formula battle. Wondering if it’s the formula or if it’s a weak digestive track. It’s hard to tell. This morning she was pretty fussy but not too awful. This afternoon she was much better but at one point she just kept crying out while she was laying/sleeping in her bouncy chair and I finally just broke down bawling my eyes out.
I cried and bounced her and told her I just didn’t know what to do but that whenever she was hurting so was Mommy. I picked her up and held her close to me and kissed her and snuggled her and she eventually went to sleep, peacefully. While I was sitting there I realized my overflow of emotions was partially related to her being so fussy but also I was a little disappointed in myself. I set these high expectations of getting the house clean and making dinner and doing all of these wonderful things since I no longer had to work but I hadn’t been getting them done and felt like a huge failure. I realized at that moment that maybe my expectations were just a little too far out there for right now. That maybe, since I am only 3 weeks postpartum, I should stick with the small things I’ve been doing like laundry and dishes and of course, taking care of Zoey. I realized right now I just need to focus on Zoey and the rest can wait. We can eat sandwiches until I can get my stuff together and have time and patience to cook a real meal. After making this realization, I felt sooo much better and so much more at peace with everything. I then fed her and we took a lovely 2 hour nap in the bed together. She laid in my arms and we snoozed so peacefully. It couldn’t have been more perfect!
And since Mother’s Day is coming up soon and it is my first, I thought I’d comment on something that happened recently that totally made me feel like a real Mom. Yesterday we went to the mall and got our hair cut and I kept saying I needed to take a shower after we got home because I had little tidbits of hair all over me, which was in turn getting all over the baby and everything I touched. However, since I was so busy I never got around to taking one. The thing is, before we even left for the mall I was projectile vomited on by the sweet little angel baby. I mean, everywhere. And guess when I finally took a shower? Around 9 PM tonight, hah. Nice, right? I spent the entire day with projectile vomit residue all over my chest and tiny hair tidbits all over me and stinky armpits. And honestly, as I realized all of this, I just had to have a big ol’ smile because this is what motherhood is. And I am totally ok with that. It actually made me a little happy to know that I can finally relate to all of those mommies out there who talk about those sacred showers that seem to be so few and far between. I guess I’ve officially joined the Mommy’s club.
In non-Zoey related news, I would like to announce that my aunt had her baby yesterday morning! She was due the day before me but had been measuring a little ahead throughout her entire pregnancy. She had a beautiful baby girl weighing in at just over 8lbs and her name is Addisyn Ann. They live in Illinois so I am bummed that I can’t hold her or meet her yet but hopefully that time will come soon enough. I’m so happy for them!
2 Comments
Jessica on May 9, 2009 at 6:44 am.
I know all too well how incredibly frustrating it can be, but hang in there. You will eventually find a formula that does not upset her tummy.
Both of my babies started out on Enfamil with Lipil, only to be switched to the Similac Isomil Advanced. They both were lactose intolerant. Not sure whether you have tried this yet, but thought I would share with you. I used to play with their legs, bringing their knees up to their bellies. It always caused them to relieve some gas.. and we always used the drops (which you are).
Good luck Candace (& Gene)!
Amy on May 10, 2009 at 6:34 am.
HAPPY 1st MOTHER’S DAY!!! Hope it’s very very special for you!!!!!!!!!!!!