Hazy Ramblings

Hey There

During the first week of April, I went to the dentist and had 2 fillings done. Last Monday (my birthday) I went back to the dentist for a short visit so they could fix one of the fillings because I had endured an entire week of constant tooth pain. He adjusted my bite and we called it good. Well, the next day a certain someone decided she couldn’t stay put and I had a baby so I forgot about the tooth issues until the 2nd day in the hospital where I realized I couldn’t eat without horrible pain on the same side of my mouth. Well, I went back to the dentist today where they had to refill that tooth (a diffrent one, coincidentally?) and then put a temporary crown on it. I’m going back in 3 weeks for the permanent crown as soon as it comes in. I guess that tooth is cracked really far down. Ugh! Just what I wanted to deal with only a week into this whole baby thing.

After that little outing we went home and just loafed around. Feeding a baby every 2 hours is a LOT of work and leaves no time to really get anything else done. We went to my mom’s house for dinner this evening so it was the first time for Zoey to go to Grandma’s house. We had a great time and it was good to go over there again! Made it really feel like things were getting back to “normal.”

Speaking of the every 2 hour feeding schedule, I just want to point out that it is HARD. Not the sleep deprivation thing, I’m doing just fine with that.. But this little stinker LOVES to sleep and we usually spent a good 30-45 minutes trying to wake her up just so we can feed her. So we set the timer for 2 hours, spend 30-45 minutes waking her up and then finally feed her and get her back to bed and then set the timer again. Technically she is probably only eating every 3 hours because of that but there isn’t much we can do. We COULD set it for every 1 hour but then that means neither one of us would ever be getting any substantial sleep, which is just crazy. We’re taking her back to the doctor on Friday for a quick weight check so I am really crossing my fingers that all of Gene and I’s hard work and perseverance has paid off. It is unbelievably difficult to spent 30-45 minutes “torturing” your child to try to get them awake enough just so you can force food down their throat. Most of the time this involves us taking all of her clothes off, blowing on various parts of her body, playing with her feet, poking her tummy, wiping her body down with a cold wipe, changing her diaper multiple times and as a last resort, taking her temperature. Yes, she absolutely HATES having a thermometer in her armpits. It really stinks to have to do all of this but you do what you have to do. She is just SO tiny.

The 2 nursing nightgowns I had ordered a couple of weeks ago came in finally so I am really excited about that. I can’t exactly nurse right now because we’re both struggling to get that down but I do pump every 2 hours when the munchkin feeds so it will help with that. Plus, I got sleeveless gowns so it will be so much cooler. We’re keeping the house warmer than we normally do, not to mention the fact that it is starting to heat up outside these days.

Well, my tooth is really sore so I think I am going to go pop a couple more extra strength tylenol and maybe just relax a bit before the next feeding. After the next feeding I am going to lay in the papasan chair (where I’m sleeping these days) and get some sleep. Oh I wanted to mention that I took a nap in my bed this afternoon for a few hours (have I mentioned how much I love my husband?? He is amazing!!) and it was significantly easier to get out of bed afterwards and a lot less painful. Looks like recovery is going well! I am crossing my fingers that maybe by next week some time we can move back to our bedroom and start sleeping in our bed again. Oh would that be heavenly!

Zoey: 1 Week Old

Daddy & Zoey

People have constantly reminded me throughout my pregnancy that I was going to be completely shocked by how in love I was going to be after Zoey was born. Sure, I believed them but I guess they are right when they say that you can’t truly know this kind of love until you’ve actually experienced it first hand. I am so in love with this tiny little baby girl. I can’t get enough of her baby smell. I love seeing her face during the 3 AM feedings and I actually like changing her little diapers, regardless of the contents. There is also this extremely overwhelming love and emotion that sweeps over me whenever I see Gene with her. My entire world is enveloped by these two people and I feel like the luckiest woman in the entire universe.

When I was a young girl I played with baby dolls the majority of the time. I was always the mother and I loved taking care of my little dolls. I’ve always known I wanted to be a mother from the time when I was a little kid up until now but now that I am experiencing it first hand, I know for sure that this is exactly what I was meant to do. I am bound and determined to give this little girl the best life she can have.

Yesterday Zoey turned 1 week old. We can hardly believe it! I have no idea where the last week went, it has been a whirlwind. Now that my c-section incision is healing a bit more and it is becoming a little easier to do certain things, I hope time will slow down just a little bit. We are still working on getting the jaundice out of her system. We’re having to wake her up on the dot every 2 hours around the clock to feed her. Sometimes it feels like we are force feeding her and we hate that but we know it is best for her right now. She needs to put some weight on! We’re going to the doctor’s office on Friday for a weight check. Cross your fingers for us!

We took Zoey to the doctor on Monday morning and they had to take some blood to check her jaundice levels. Well, they couldn’t get a vein because they are so tiny so they ended up pricking her heel and then squeezing out the blood they needed. It was AWFUL. I had to excuse myself to the bathroom so I could cry :( I really just wanted to scoop her up off of the table and run away with her in my arms.

I am so sorry these paragraphs are so disorganized. I am in a little bit of a haze these days. It’s 4 AM and we gotta wake up the princess in 15 minutes for another force feed. Ugh. I’ll pump and then hopefully sleep for 2 hours until the next feeding. I am dreading today because I have to go to the dentist to get a tooth checked out. Just what I wanted to do after the little munchkin was born!

Birth Story: Coming Soon

Zoey's Big Beautiful Smile

I promise I am going to work on writing up the birth story soon. I want to get it typed up before I forget anything. I have a very large tendency to do such a thing lately. I put an empty carton of milk back into the fridge. Oops.

Right now I am really struggling with keeping up in the online world. Gene and I have been uploading pictures to my Flickr account and I’ve received such nice and touching comments from people, I just can’t seem to find the time to go and reply to each one. I looked at my Google Reader this evening and there were 269 unread items. I quickly shut the browser tab and I think my mind ran for it’s life.

I know once routines are in place I will have time to keep up with everything but until then, I am having to put certain things on the back burner.

Zoey was 5lb 5oz at birth and by the 2nd day, she had lost 5oz and was down to 5lb. We started formula and she quickly gained 2oz. Today at the doctor’s office she was back down to 5lbs. We’re on a strict 2 hour feeding schedule now. When the kitchen timer goes off, Gene gets a bottle and feeds her, changes her diaper and puts her back down. I pump for 20 minutes and then we set the timer for 2 hours again. Rinse and repeat! So far it is working out well.

My milk is NOT cooperating. Sometimes I can barely get 1oz total from both breasts in a pump session and other times I may not even get 1/2 an oz. It’s so frustrating because I want her to only have breast milk. I can’t get her to latch on for the life of me. It is really discouraging but I am going to keep on keepin’ on and hopefully it will work out eventually.

Zoey Elise Chao

Zoey Sound Asleep

Zoey Elise Chao
April 14, 2009 at 9:20 AM
5lb 5oz 18 1/2 inches

What a birthday present this was! I was 36 weeks pregnant on the dot on Monday the 13th (my 27th birthday, so it happens) and that night my water broke. Zoey was born by c-section at 9:20 AM on the 14th because she was breech. Amazingly enough, for a late pre-term baby she was perfectly healthy! Her apgars were 8 and 9, which is just amazing to me.

She is the light of our lives. We love her to pieces and still have a hard time believing we did this. We’re doing great at home now and trying to get some what of a routine started. Tomorrow morning we’re taking her to the doctor for her first check up and I am just a tad bit nervous about trying to have everything ready and be out the door and at the appointment on time with a brand new baby.

I’ll write more later and definitely go into more details about how much of a WHIRLWIND this birth experience was. 4 weeks early and completely unprepared or unknowing, Gene and I definitely got thrown into this thing without any expectation! It was totally worth it but wow what a crazy night the 13th/14th were. Happy Birthday to me!! Thank you dear Zoey, you definitely know how to make your mama the happiest woman on earth.

Pregnancy and Weight Gain

I am having one of those mornings where I just can’t get my tummy to be satisfied. I eat something and then 30 minutes later it is growling again. And I’m not exactly eating bad things for me, either. I’m eating the same things that normally would fill me up. I guess it’s time to start chuggin’ the water, huh?

I got up and had a packet of Banana Bread Weight Control oatmeal, 1 C. of skim milk and 1 small banana around 6:15 AM. Here it is 8 AM and I just ate a 100 calorie english muffin with about 1 TBSP of peanut butter on it. And I am STILL wanting more food. I hate that!

I’ve gained a little bit of weight in this pregnancy, more than I “should” according to my doctor. She actually wanted me to lose weight during this pregnancy. Hah. Ooops. It’s not like I’ve been stuffing my face. And honestly, I have no idea where the weight gain is coming from. My diet really hasn’t changed at all over the last few months and for some reason every time I go in every 2 weeks, I have either maintained or gained 2-4lbs. Not sure what is up with that, honestly. And all I can do is just tell myself going into my appointments that she is going to complain to me about my weight gain and I can just sit there and ignore her.

The thing is, I KNOW I’ve gained weight. And I’m pretty sure it bothers me more than it bothers her. All I can do is set goals for myself after Zoey arrives and work hard to achieve them. I have big plans to get back on my diet after she is here and start exercising more.

Speaking of exercise, it has become really difficult to do. Even walking has become SO uncomfortable that I dread it. I’ve been carrying Zoey really low through this entire pregnancy and as she grows, it gets increasingly difficult to walk and feel comfortable. It hurts my hips and makes me feel like I have to empty my bladder after just 5 minutes of walking.

I’ve had no real complaints about being pregnant and I’ve enjoyed my special time with my daughter but I am honestly ready for her to be here. I am only 35 weeks today but I am to the point where I want her here so I can move on with my life, start losing some weight and feel comfortable doing normal things like walking again. I’m sure I’ll regret saying that in a year when she is having her first birthday party and I’m wondering where time went and start devising a plan to revert her to infancy.

One more side note that is more for me than for anyone else: We hate our doctor! She did something recently that is extremely private that I can’t really go into detail about but it is something that no doctor should ever do. Anyway, so Gene and I are sticking with her because we only have 3-5 weeks left of this to endure. It would be a huge mess to switch doctor’s this late in the game, especially since we have already paid her. Anyway, I trust her to deliver my baby safely and that is all that matters to us at this point. We’ll go see her once a week until the baby is here, which means I should only have to see her 6 more times at most, which includes delivery. It has definitely been a learning experience!